Weekdays or Weekends

[Till23]

I agree @MJG017 being alone in public is difficult and you do think others notice. However, when you look there are others who are alone. Eating out alone though occurs a lot less. People are also probably thinking about themselves and not even aware, or only vaguely or momentarily aware of you.

I find gratefulness at these times helps. Feeling grateful for the things I do have, like roof over my head, the ability to be out and about that sort of thing. It's not easy but it helps to divert your attention and it's not easy to feel grateful and down at the same time. I also found as I've got older it's a bit easier because you are more visible and it's somehow kind of more acceptable to others that older people are on their own. 

[Jlol]

Weekdays are worse for me, 100%.

It's because I'm at work so are unable to do most of the things I need to do to keep myself feeling well and safe.

Work is necessary to pay bills and put food on the table, but it is also absolutely making me more unwell.

[Shaz51]

Hello @Dreamy , @Dimity , @MJG017 , @Till23 , @Jlol , , @Ru-bee , @rav3n , @Jynx how is everyone going today xx

We moved into Mum`s house (which was my grandparents' house) to look after her until her passing in hospital 

Sometimes I find it hard because there are so many memories and stuff from my mum still here 

I am trying to put our stamp on the place which is hard 

[Dimity]

Work was similar for me @Jlol until I retired early but I'd never got the hang of selfcare so things were still difficult. I don't know what to suggest but I feel for you and know how hard it can be.

@Shaz51 wow it was your grandparents' place too. That's a lot of emotions and memories and history. I still have some of my parents' stuff, it feels a big responsibility to do the right thing with it. I've procrastinated but it's deeper than procrastination, it's a worry and a fear surrounding it, a bit like the relationship with my parents. 

[Appleblossom]

Hearing you @Shaz51 about wading through memories. It is a great idea to put your own mark or style on things.

@MJG017 yep, know the feeling of comparing myself to family groups out and about and having a good time. Working on what makes us feel worthy and not triggered into negativity is important. 

@Jlol yep, you got the necessities right. I have worked on weekends since I was 13  so don't have the attitude that they mean free time.

I also like @Dimity 's point about needing a day to reflect. Often it is a week day for me... But mostly I just try not to have too much on so I can be both busy for the necessary things and distraction and reflect. Lol life's juggling act. ... Thinking of you Dim. Hope your home is still able to be safe and decent enough to be your sanctuary. 

I cared and cooked for grandfather way back before there was home help.

I have had access to a cleaner in the last few years but also found it difficult to manage. It can be intrusive if they don't understand and want to push their own agendas. I had to let 2 go. I am settling for a lady who does less but also has a chat as a support worker and is decent to my son.

Take your time as you manage it. Your recovery is key. I can sense your sadness about not being able to do some garden work. I am working on preparing mine for a lower level of maintenance. I also had to get a new heater installed this week. Glad I am frugal and it didn't overwhelm me financially. Yep lots of responsibility in home ownership but I am grateful for it too.

@Till23 love this thread topic too. Lol. I only did 9-5 ish for about 10 years, then for a while it was 24/7 with kids, renovations and a company. So the week/weekend dichotomy didn't have as much impact on me as it does for many. 

[Bow]

Some days they all just roll into one @Till23  and it’s all difficult. But in general I find weekends more challenging as I don’t always have my usual supports available. More so my SW who works maybe one weekend day a month. And the same with my CM- don’t ever know who is working weekends from comm mh. 

[Jynx]

@Shaz51 settling into a new space is always a bit wonky feeling hey!! I hope you are able to chuck some art up or something? 

[Till23]

Yes @Jlol I retired because work was not a good place at the end, as there were new people running the show. I would have preferred to work a bit longer to have more money for retirement, but I was finding it too difficult. I can always try and find something to do for work if I need to I suppose. Before I retired I found weekdays hard because of work, but sometimes weekends were hard because I don't have anyone to share them with. I try to get out and do things and I have acquaintainces I sometimes do things with

[Till23]

Oh that was a big move for you too then @Shaz51.

I find it hard when I go into the rooms Dad used at my place - he was downstairs and had a kitchenette, a bathroom, bedroom and lounge room himself. I still haven't done much with his things. I have started but it's difficult.

[Bonniebear]

Hello I find I start feeling funny on Friday night. Everyone has kids, friends or a partner and I don't have any of that. Not even a pet because im scared of loss/abandonment and not being good enough. I also have a huge issue with limerance which I've been dealing with since 2015. Work is pretty much my whole life.