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FCH32
Casual Contributor

Hi

Hopefully I've done this correctly...

 

Hi, I'm FCH32 [Edited by Moderator], I'm 32. I have been living with depression and anxiety for about 13 years now. Last year I was diagnosed with ADHD. I thought maybe it would change everything; in some ways it has, I'm holding down a basic job and I'm less anxious I think.

 

I'm very tired of waking up everyday and planning how I'm going to fight the sadness. I take medication, exercise, meditate, go to therapy, spend time with friends, eat probiotics. At one time I got TMS treatment for a while and even participated in an esketamine therapy trial for treatment resistant depression. Everything helps for a little while, but nothing is ever enough.

 

I'm resigned to the fact that I'm not supposed to take my life, even if life is unbearable and hopeless, so I keep doing it. Keep waking up. Keep trying. Keep dreaming of finding love or achieving something meaningful.

 

Anyway, I thought maybe I'd add this forum to my ever growing list. 

Maybe something I've done will help someone else more than me, and that will somehow make my existence more worthwhile.

 

Obviously I'm having a bad day. Negative self talk can be so brutal. 

 

Anyway, if anyone can reccomend somewhere for group therapy, particularly ADHD related, I would appreciate it. I'm also interested in seeing a psych who specialises in ADHD. I'm in Melbourne.

 

Thanks for having me

7 REPLIES 7
Ru-bee
Peer Support Worker

Re: Hi

Hello and welcome @FCH32

 

I firstly just want to acknowledge that it's no small thing to reach out somewhere new, especially when you're not having a great day. I hope that the forums can be a safe space to connect and talk about what you're going through on the bad days, and hopefully the good ones too.

 

I'm hearing that you're after some recommendations for groups and practitioners which can be a bit tricky on here due to our guidelines around anonymity and privacy (you can reach about them here) so we can't recommend specific ones, but we can try to point you in the right direction. You might like to take a look at the APS psychologist search for a psych specialising in ADHD. I did a search here based on the info you provided, but you can narrow it down further yourself.

Also just a last quick note while I've mentioned anonymity - we've just had to removed the mention of your name from your post, we use our usernames on here rather than our real names to maintain our privacy 🙂

Jake63
Senior Contributor

Re: Hi

Hi @Ru-bee and @FCH32 

 

As you say, it is no small thing to reach out and ask for help. I totally agree and I have been there myself personally.

 

My story is very much a little bit different to @FCH32, while I am a neurodiverse person and I am very proud to identify as being a person on the autism spectrum, part of my trouble was actually finding people that were just interested, knowledgeable, and wanted to work with people on the spectrum. There is a small irony here, I think, while I am a person on the autism spectrum that doesn't necessarily mean I know everything there is to know about autism! 

 

Earlier this year, I attended a 12 week autism support group. Thanks to that support group, I learned so much more about my autism. For example, one thing that I learned that I struggled a lot with is interoception. I understand that this might not be something people know. Here is a handy definition from Gemini AI:

 

Interception is our internal sensory system that allows us to perceive and understand what's happening inside our bodies, including sensations like hunger, thirst, and pain, as well as emotional states like anxiety or excitement. I have heard it described as the eighth sense! I remember from my support group 2 female participants sharing how they struggle to identify when they are in pain for example. One of the female participants said that she can identify when she is hungry and full, but she cannot sense physical pain. Myself, I can experience, feel, and notice when I am in pain but not when I am hungry or full!

 

@FCH32- I also hope the forums can provide you with some comfort and support. I have a very close friend who also has ADHD and XE identifies as being neurodiverse so I understand and accept your ADHD unconditionally.

FCH32
Casual Contributor

Re: Hi

Thank you for your reply, what you said about interception is so fascinating. I often experience anxiety and excitement as the same physical sensation, so I get stressed out on holidays or at events I actually really want to be at.
A support group sounds like a good idea.
FCH32
Casual Contributor

Re: Hi

Thank you! Sorry I didn't read the guidelines first, I'll look at them
Ru-bee
Peer Support Worker

Re: Hi

That's totally okay @FCH32 they can be easy to miss when you first sign up 😊

Just wanted to add another quick tip, to tag members and make sure they get notified when you respond to members, just type "@" and then choose from the suggested usernames that pop up (or type it in if it doesn't come up) you'll know it's worked when it comes up in blue like @FCH32 

Jake63
Senior Contributor

Re: Hi

Dear @FCH32 and @Ru-bee,

 

Yes - they can be easy to miss when you first sign up. Even I am still brushing up on my knowledge and awareness of the SANE online community guidelines.

 

I found my support group to be very helpful. I learned a lot about myself and I was very happy to hear how other people - particularly girls - experience their autism. I have had next to no exposure to women on the spectrum. So I am always happy to learn more in that regard!

ploak
New Contributor

Re: Hi

Im hearing you on the neg self talk, it's crushing. but you're right at least this may help someone else knowing others are in the same boat - just a different ocean, so to speak