✨Sunday Intention Setting✨

[Kashmina]

Thank you for your words @AlwaysMyself.

Yes not sleeping well completely sets off the darkness again. Thank you for reminding me of that. Today I felt like I couldnt cope with anything and that all the things I had to engage with I could not handle - remember just a moment.

Do you work full-time? What is your current situation with addressing your MH issues with them, if I have understood that correctly? You dont have to answer if you dont want to.

@Cuddlebear I was going to ask do you receive any funding from the government for some support services but @AlwaysMyself just mentioned something? I was thinking maybe someone for companionship would be nice

[AlwaysMyself]

@Kashmina I work part-time; I can't do fulltime work or I get too exhausted and depressed.  I think I need to take some extended time off work in order to recovery from long-term burnout and worsening MH over the past 2 years. It's been a long time (over 10 years) since my MH was this bad, and it has not been improving even though I have been "doing all the right things" including starting to see a counsellor regularly again. My biggest "problem" with my MH (I think) is that I do not find enjoyment/pleasure in anything (even though I do things regularly still) and have no memory of what 'happiness' or 'joy' is because I have been depressed since before I was a teenager. Living is a chore I do for others' sake - and that needs to change; I need something more.

[Kashmina]

Morning @AlwaysMyself

Thank you for sharing 😊

This is exactly me, so I completely understand! The burnout I experienced about 4 years ago has left me depleted in a way I can not even describe (except you have done it well). Every time I try to engage with the work area again it wears me out (and unfortunately most places are very challenging to work in now) and the burnout continues. I too am able to engage in life but that does not seem to shift how fatigued I am, how anxious I am and how any form of stress will cripple me. For some reason I can not move past this at this stage. I recently went back to my psych who has mentioned and always has - this type of burnout is not something you mess with and needs to be taken seriously so I must listen to what my body and brain are telling me. I have but its hard to navigate when you also have many other pressures in life.

In regards to feeling the disconnection with enjoyment/pleasure etc - she did discuss this and the long term effects of depression (I cant remember the name)

Had a very stressful day yesterday which brought on a lot of anxiety so I am going to try to take it easy today. I hope you have a good day too

[AlwaysMyself]

@Kashmina Would be interested to know any ideas/tips of what has helped for you (even if only sometimes) with your long-term burnout and depression.  I suspect my neural network has gone dormant in certain areas of my brain re: pleasure/enjoyment/positive-feeling; no evidence as have not done an fMRI, but it makes sense in terms of how neural networks that aren't used degrade over time. Or perhaps even did not form fully as a child??

I hope today has gotten better for you this afternoon than it was in the morning.